One thing I always find interesting on boot camp or 1 on 1s is how much students want to hear the words I’m using. Of course, it’s pretty well known that it’s not so important what you say but how you say it, and that body language is more important, yadda, yadda. (This is the biggest benefit of doing a live program, in my opinion. You get to see the body language, posture, expressions, takeaways, etc.)

However, you do need to say something for your PUA Opener, and starting that conversation can most often be the hardest part. When I started in this stuff, I shelled out for the Routines Manual. There is some really top quality good stuff in there for beginners.

After a while, I started to see the underlying elements that made the openers work, so I came up with some of my own. (I often would make up opinion openers congruent to my real life.) In time, I had gone out enough that I started saying things off-the-cuff and learned when to say opportune things at opportune moments.

Today, I don’t plan PUA Openers when I go out. (I’m more worried about my state… or keeping semi-sober :p) If I can’t come up with stuff on the spot, I’ll either go totally direct and try bowl her over, or I’ll strategize and roll off one set to another. (The latter is usually when I’m trying to reach a really hot girl and need to go in through her friends.)

PUA Openers Examples

These are some of the best openers that come into play for me often being a PUA:

• “You can’t look at me like that and not talk to me.” Used when she makes eye contact with you. This is good because she’ll usually start blushing.
• “We’re the best looking people in here, so I guess we should talk to each other and get it over with. What’s your name?”
• “You know, just because you’re hot doesn’t mean you don’t have to talk to me.” This one has been around for a while.
• “You’re cute. You should talk to me.” Being really cheeky and laid back about this. The cocky guy leaning against the bar.
• “Hey I think you’re fuckin’ sexy in that XYZ. Who are you?” Blow out rate is higher with this one, but when it hits, it hits hard. Tons of non-verbal elements. (You’re not allowed to use this until you read this post by Future.)
• “Hi, my name is Nick. How’s your night?”
• “Hey guys, what’s up?”
• Waving girls over.  Lots of facial expressions involved.

The beauty is that these don’t sound contrived or weird. They are fun, flirty and some are cheeky. It’s a real organic (“natural”) way of flirting.

I often find that the best pick up openers are spontaneous and in the moment. When you’re in the moment you’re completely genuine and all of your true confidence gets projected on to her AND you’re not reaching for an outcome. Totally a topic for another day though…

This is night stuff, for those wondering.